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These Cold and Rusted Lungs

by Amy Courts

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1.
You know I know you like the day knows daylight I know you like the sun knows warm You know I know who you are You know I know you in your strength And when you’re weak you hide your face You know I love you, I love you anyway (Chorus) If I could break, you know I’d break If I could bend, I’d bend to Become the knot that holds you up I’d mend you If I could speak you know I’d say the right thing And you would see we’re so much deeper than the depths It’s us or no one, or no one else (Chorus) I love you so much more than all of this Oh, than all of this I love you so much more than anything Than anything else So if you should break you know I’ll break If you should bend, I’ll bend too If I should break, you know I’ll break If I should bend I’ll bend too I’ll be the one who holds you up I’ll mend you, I will mend you, I will mend
2.
In You 04:17
Standing high upon a mountain I’ve longed to hear you speak Turning deafening reels of chaos Into symphonies of peace I have longed to see a vision Fiery pillars in the night Or to move beyond the mystery As your glory passes by But I will still myself Oh I will wait for you I will delight myself in you alone You’re all I’m longing for I will delight myself in you Weary nights spent in the valley I’ve seen you paint the sky Decorations of your presence Proof of company divine Every moment’s one you’ve given With every breath I breathe your name In your shelter wounds are mended Stirring hope in what remains I offer all myself Oh, all my hope is you I will delight myself in you alone You’re all I’m longing for I will delight myself in you And I’ll find my refuge in the love you give It’s all I’m living for I will delight myself in you
3.
Breathe 05:09
Looking over the Catalina’s Sun sets below a jagged sky Like a lover in the rearview mirror Ain’t no questions, no asking why When it’s over, it’s time to get back on the highway I ain’t no fan of confession God knows everything I’ve done, anyway And I can live with my own conscience At least, that’s what I tell myself every day But it’s over, over and over and over (CHORUS) Look who’s down Who’s crying now Take these cold and rusted lungs And make them breathe somehow Turn around Who’s burning down Just take this heart of plastic love And make it real somehow I didn’t ever stop believing I just get a little gun shy Don’t get me wrong, I’ve got it all figured out But, sometimes I lose the words I’m living by But it’s over, over and over and over (CHORUS) (…Make me feel somehow…) Oh, well it’s over, I sure miss that light on the mountain (CHORUS) (…Make me feel somehow…)
4.
Drowning 04:57
If I could stop from thinking Then I might be safe from sinking into this And if I could stop the doubting Then I might not be put out by what I miss Cause there’s always something holding, Always keeping me from going anywhere And I am so delirious And the hope I need’s too furious to care And I can’t swim this sea I get pulled under by the waves That first caught my stubborn gaze And nothing’s holding me Keeping me from going down All I know is I can’t drown All this over-analyzing, Oh it’s always patronizing me I read into every word and pull to pieces what I’ve heard Until it murders me And it’s not a pleasant death To be burdened by the stress of the unknown And it’s everything I dread, and yet It’s all inside my head, I ought to let it go Let it go Cause I can’t breathe these lies They’re poison to my hope Tainting everything I know And I refuse to die Like a lamb who’s led astray I won’t be deceptions prey tonight
5.
The Liars 03:55
How can you turn and walk away Leaving me with so much left to say These questions never answered Growing in me like a cancer You said You would never leave me But now the liars say that You’ve deceived me And I can’t hear Your voice above the crowd So can You speak a little louder? You said You’d never let me go In my darkest day, I’m not alone But now the liars say I’m too far gone And You can’t help me Oh, You said You’d overcome But now the liars have me on the run And You said You would always hear my call But can You hear my voice at all Can You hear my voice at all Can You hear my voice at all Cause I said I would always love You And I don’t wanna hear that I can’t trust You And I said I would always believe Oh, yeah You said You would never leave me But now the liars say that You’ve deceived me And I can’t hear Your voice above the crowd So can You speak a little louder Can You speak a little louder Can You speak a little louder You said You’d never let me go…
6.
Stand 04:54
Take me home, Away from this mess Away from what’s empty And only makes breathing irrelevant Take me home, Away from this distraction It’s endlessly stealing All the purpose and feeling within my bones Oh no, I can’t wait any longer Oh, no, I can’t wait anymore (CHORUS) I cannot stand one more moment Of tireless living Endlessly giving what I don’t have No, I cannot stand one more moment Where nothing is perfect It just doesn’t seem worth it To try again Take me home, Away from this madness Where nothing’s worth having And yet everyone’s grabbing for something more Take me home, Away from what I’ve become Away from this tolerance And the ceaseless indifference to what I know No, I can’t wait any longer Oh no, I can’t wait anymore (CHORUS) Well all I’ve been searching and hoping for I can’t even know if it’s there fore sure And they’ll say it’s all in my head But it’s working me over Just get me out of this mess, And with every last breath I breathe I promise this I won’t go one more day without You No, I cannot stand one more moment I’ve let it rule me Overcome and undo me, time and again No, I will not stand one more moment Living without You So far from what I know is true
7.
O Holy God 03:47
O Holy God May we so small be lifted to your dwelling place Behold your holiness O Holy God May we so small be lifted high to see your face Behold your loveliness For we are surely arrogant And prone to our own ways And unto us we pray thee lend Your righteousness
8.
Shiver 02:48
You want to make me something else It’s hard enough to be me You want to wrap me up in bows And put me on parade But I’m not what you think I’ll lose your rings I’ll toss your string of pearls I’m not your girl (CHORUS) And I thought you had everything I’d ever wanted But I’m not for sale And I won’t let you wrap me around your little finger Pull your guns out, stroke the trigger You won’t see me shake and shiver There’s more to life than what you think And there’s more to thinking Than to doll up For the prince of these But you can’t hide your scars and bruises You can’t just pretend the things you chose Don’t own you know (CHORUS) You want to pull me into a fight To prove I need you more than I need to breathe (CHORUS) Pull your guns out and watch me Pull your guns out and watch me closely Pull your guns out, stroke the trigger You won’t see me shake and shiver
9.
Inevitable 06:17
I’m not who I said I wanted to be anymore I’m the kind I detest, the kind I abhor And there don’t seem a way I can walk through that door Without leaving behind what’s within Well I’ve never been much for strung-out goodbyes Let’s just get it done and forget all the little lies About how we’ll always be friends Though you know you’ll despise me when it’s over Is it over (CHORUS) Cause I don’t want to face what’s been staring me down And I don’t want to give up what I’ve been holding out for But all of these days, and all of these nights They only prove I’ve been taking my time To fight what’s inevitable Well, who’s to say this is not how it’s meant to be And who’s going to say they know better than chemistry You can tell me I’m wrong, but I’ll say I don’t feel it in me But you know that I do I do (CHORUS) Well maybe the Truth isn’t dependent on me It won’t bend to lend a hand of sympathy It won’t break or be shaken to make it easier on me To keep living a lie I’ve been living a lie (CHORUS)
10.
I’ll lay it out and make it simple for a simpleton to see Call it easy, that won’t make it easy like it ought to be I want to make this clear for both of us tonight We can’t make this right (CHORUS) Cause it’s never quite as simple as “I told you so” No, it’s never quite as simple as “I told you so” And it’s never what you want until you’ve lost your hold No, it’s never quite as simple as “I told you so” We cover messes with forgiveness and excuses not to leave But then we always end up right back where we are and shouldn’t be When ever stone is turned and mud still lines the ground And there’s no way around… (CHORUS) (Bridge) Because I told you so And we tried… You won’t apologize and I won’t wait for you to make amends I want your love, but I don’t want it if it’s only as a friend We gave it everything, but nothing’s quite enough But it’s never quite that simple when you’re letting go No, it’s never quite that simple when I’m letting go And it’s never what you want until you’ve lost your hold No, it’s never quite as simple as I told you so I told you so.

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released July 30, 2008

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Amy Courts Minneapolis, Minnesota

With her trademark impassioned vocals, captivating melodies, and audacious honesty, Amy Courts expresses with effortless fluency her take on love, heartache, spirituality, hope, and personal demons. Though her voice and songs invoke inevitable comparisons to artists like Patty Griffin and Jennifer Knapp, her sound and experience are uniquely her own and are delivered with a rare distinction. ... more

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